After four months of tending the vines and fending off hordes of chipmunks, we harvested the tomatoes. Or rather the forty percent of the tomatoes that hadn't been gnawed or dragged off to the provinces. Victory was ours! We gorged on the tomatoes, noon and night. Turns out my innards are tomato intolerant. Acutely so.
There's a lesson to be learned here, but I'll be damned if I want to think about it.